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It's Ok That You're Not Ok: Meeting Grief and Loss in a Culture That Doesn't Understand

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She understands the pain that grieving people carry on top of their actual grief, including the pain of being judged, dismissed, and misunderstood. Our rampant avoidance of feeling-with-each-other requires us to distance ourselves from environmental devastation, from human suffering, from child abuse and sex trafficking, from global wars, from hate crimes of all kinds. But her assumption is that sudden, accidental deaths of young people (like that of her boyfriend) are uniquely hard to process, and the book reads almost more like a memoir at times. Registration is open now for Megan Devine’s 6 month online Grief Care Professional Certificate Program.

Mark has been interviewed twice by Oprah Winfrey as part of her Soul Series radio show, and was interviewed by Robin Roberts on Good Morning America.

Practical guidance for managing stress, improving sleep, and decreasing anxiety without trying to fix your pain . It also perfectly evaluates what our western culture and medical establishment get wrong about grief. I think Devine’s grief hierarchy comes from her own unfortunate experience of people assuming she should “just move on” because it was “just” her boyfriend who died; they weren’t married and didn’t have kids so people were less sympathetic, perhaps. This is hands-down the best book on grief I've found, and I've been looking for a good many years now.

If I thought I would’ve been as miserable forever as she constantly repeats, I’d be even more depressed. Watching her die was at once a horrible nightmare and a relief to see the end of her suffering—I felt so much guilt for feeling relieved, and so much anguish over the many wrong things I had said and all the things left unsaid. Going through my own experiences with multiple dimensions of grief, I’ve heard almost every well-meant but unhelpful, offensive, and out-of-touch remark. It’s OK That You’re Not OK is the perfect how-to manual to help heal and support ourselves, each other, and our death-avoidant society.

HUFFPOST Featured on NPR's RADIO TIMES and WISCONSIN PUBLIC RADIO When a painful loss or life-shattering event upends your world, here is the first thing to know: there is nothing wrong with grief. Not OK is a book for grieving people, those who love them, and all those seeking to love themselves?

This approach is perfectly sensible and quite common in many books on difficult subjects such as grief and cancer. It is a very human book, full of grace, permission to feel, and written in a way that it does not come off as one of those 'self-help' books. I agree with her basic point on the subject: that enlightenment in the face of grief is to look straight at it, staying emotionally open and bearing witness to the pain, knowing that it can’t be changed.

Megan’s work is featured widely in the media, including the New York Times, NPR, Washington Post, GQ, Harvard Business Review, and The Atlantic. The book ten sheds light on all the ways in which this approach to grief is counter-productive and often does more harm than good to the grieving person. a) The beauty of the experience of grief: I agree that we need to redefine grief from a problem to solve (focusing on erasing pain, maintaining control) to an experience to tend (focusing on feeling pain, on the journey from not OK to OK).

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